Most Transparent White House Ever
A White House insider who wished to remain nameless blasted back today at those who are mocking President Obama's transparency award. "This is the most transparent Administration that this Country has ever seen," he said using a voice synthesizer software program to hide his identity from the interviewer. "I just wish that I could show you all the documents we have to prove his transparency, but unfortunately they are classified" he went on.
The interview was conducted by a reporter who was led blindfolded down a hall to a secret closet beside an undisclosed room where the un-named staffer was typing his answers to pre-screened questions into a voice synthesizer program that would then relay the answers into a speaker in the closet with the reporter.
When asked if other Presidents had kept documentation of their transparency, he replied that they had, and that those were readily available on the internet. "In fact," he stated "if you want to know how transparent Obama really is, just look at the records from Bush and imagine that he was 40 or 50 percent more transparent, and you will begin to see how open Obama really is".
The transparency award presentation, which had been scheduled for this week, was postponed when the White House received word that a reporter who hadn't been invited to cover the event had received word as to when and where the event would be held. "There was no indication that they planned to crash the event" said the staffer "but leaks from these types of events are always a real threat and must be guarded against".