I get so sick and tired of these leftists talking about the evil health insurance companies and their pre-existing conditions. This is another example of how the left wing depends on you being a complete idiot to go along with their schemes. To show how stupid this is, I have compiled a top ten list of other "pre-existing conditions" that we should do away with if we're going to go after the health insurance industry.
10. Car Insurance Comanies
Okay, so let's say you just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by moving to Wisconsin. See where I'm going here? You are driving without insurance, then you wreck your car. Now what? Head on down to your local auto insurance company, because under President Obama, nothing is too stupid to make sense. Hence, you can insure your totaled out car as if it didn't have a scratch on it because all of that accident damage is a pre-existing condition.
9. Homeowners Insurance
Now, you are probably feeling pretty stupid. Chances are you have been struggling to make that insurance premium every month. Why bother? Wait until after the Hurricane hits. Your leveled house will be a pre-existing condition and you can get it rebuilt from the ground up without having to have spent years paying into the system.
Perhaps you're a trucker like me. Ever get to a warehouse to pick up a load and catch them trying to load damaged product on your trailer? Don't even try to stop them. Sure, that DVD player may be smashed flat, but that's a pre-existing condition. And I know you're thinking you're going to get nailed at the other end, but not so fast! They can't refuse it from you either! See how this works? The pre-existing condition just keeps getting passed along... right on down to the mind numbed Obamabot moron who purchases it then tries to take it back to Wal Mart where they inform him that he stuck with it. That's right, you can't refuse that DVD player because it's completely flattened. You don't want to be like those evil health insurance companies who refuse things based on a pre-existing condition, do you?
So you're clocking in to start your shift at the local "Piggly Wiggly". You count your drawer before hand, and it's short $35. So you go find the manager to get this squared away, right? Wrong! That shortage is a pre-existing condition. How dare you be so insensitive as to try to refuse it? That shortage will just get passed along from shift to shift until there is no money left to put in the drawer anymore, at which time the entire Corporation can go live in Obama's Socialist Paradise where nobody will ever be responsible for anything.
6. Cap And Trade
Global warming got you down? Perhaps your trying to reduce the size of your carbon footprint over there. You know, save the planet or something? Well, no need for that. After all, the carbon levels are a pre-existing condition. They were already high when you were born. Why should you have to pay for that, huh? You shouldn't. So tell Obama to quit pushing cap and trade, trying to make you pay out of pocket for the planet's pre-existing conditions. Who does he think he is, a health insurance company executive?
This is an ACORN dream come true. Got bad credit? Who cares? The whole system is based on examining pre-existing conditions, and we're above all that, right Obama? So who cares if you've never paid a bill in your life? You're entitled to a loan just like anyone else is.
4. Higher Education
Perhaps you're a young person who has been busting your tail studying and performing extra curricular activities trying to get into a good school. Well, work no more. You just might get beat out by a high school drop out. Why? Because your high school report card is a pre-existing condition. Under Obama, we're above all that petty bickering over qualifications. Those are the failed policies of the past. We can no longer afford to go along with the status quo in education. Of course, this means the end of affirmative action. Yes, your skin color is also a pre-existing condition. But don't feel bad. After we pump these graduates out into the work force, there won't be any corporations left to work for anyway.
3. The Justice System
If your a prosecutor who has been burning the midnight oil trying to get a case ready for court, you might as well hang it up and go to bed. You see, you have been compiling mounds of pre-existing conditions you call evidence to be used against a rapist or murderer. Well, we're above that nonsense now. We've moved on to a better place where we accept people for what they are right now rather than judging them for who they killed five minutes ago. The only crime we will ever be able to punish in the future is conspiracy to commit. You got it. Because you hadn't done it yet, so it's not pre-existing.
2. The Presidency
Now that you have lead us to this place of better understanding, President Obama, it's time that we address how these changes will effect you. I keep hearing you talk about the mess you inherited from President Bush. With all due respect, you're starting to sound like a health insurance salesman. Remember, the economy you inherited was a pre-existing condition. Certainly you wouldn't be so hypocritical as to expect the insurance people to pay for mine, while you get off the hook for the ones at your job, right? So man up. Every bad thing that has ever happened in the history of this Country is your fault, sir. Unless, of course, you would like to reconsider your stance on pre-existing conditions?
1. Life Insurance
Some of you reading this article have been struggling to make your life insurance payments. Idiots! Not me. I'll just wait till I check out. That's right, after I die, my family can take out a life insurance policy on me. You see, thanks to President Obama, they won't be able to deny me for a silly little pre-existing condition like my death, right? So why waste all of that money now? And here is the best part. I'm not even saving the money for my kids to pay that one insurance payment they will have to make. After all, since everyone will have good credit, they can just borrow against the premium to get the money for that!
Now perhaps your smart enough to figure out why this won't work. If not, congratulations. You're an Obamabot. You are the reason a cigarette lighter has a sticker telling you to make sure it is extinguished before you put it back in your pocket. But please don't ask the rest of us to pretend we are as stupid as you are. I'm not going to act like your idea makes any damned sense whatsoever, because it doesn't. Life is a collection of pre-existing conditions. Every move we make today determines the rules we have to play by tomorrow.